What The Kids Say: Let’s Start with the Letter ‘P’

This week, my son’s preschool class is learning about the letter “P,” which is appropriate, as pumpkins have sprouted in all retail stores overnight. Today is show-and-tell, which my son seems to love. Last time, he took his favorite world map, which also shows all of the country’s flags. He pointed out his favorite flag (Um, U.S.A, obvs). This morning, when we were discussing what he wanted to take for show-and-tell, he decided on Play-doh.

“That’s a great idea!” I said. “Isn’t your class learning about the letter ‘P’? You could make a country out of the Play-doh. Maybe Portugal? Peru? Palau?”

“Well, we have a ‘P’ chart at school and we all had to say words that begin with ‘P’,” he said. “I said Palestine.”

Of course you did. Oh, to be a fly on the wall when he announced that to his preschool teacher. Although, she seems pretty on the ball, so she probably wasn’t overly surprised.

In the same vein, I thought I’d share some of the other recent hilarious things that emerge from the mouths of my kiddos…

Yes, this is my daughter in the grocery store in her pajamas. She’s eating a sugar cookie and clutching a Jesus figurine. I also think I forgot to put shoes on her. You do you, baby girl.

While at the grocery store, Olivia got really excited about the pints of milk.
Olivia: I like tiny things! They’re my size!

Olivia: I need a cookie.
Mama: OK, I’ll give you half a cookie.
Olivia: I need two cookies.

Mama had her Pandora set to her Anthem Lights station and bluetoothed it through the minivan speakers. She was happily grooving to Maroon 5’s Moves Like Jagger when a little voice piped up from the back seat.
: What’s a jagger?
Mama: A jagger? Oh, uh, he’s a person. Mick Jagger. A…person who can dance really well.

After George discovered the geography encyclopedia he was reading had classified Madagascar as “Asia” instead of “Africa”
George: Oh. My. Gosh.
Olivia (without missing a beat): Look at her butt!
Mama: Oh!! Oh nooooo!
For the record, she got this from the movie Sing, not from me!

George: I don’t like goats. Goats eat paper. I love paper, so I don’t like goats.
Fact: George will physically embrace any ream of paper he spots. I put a whole box of copy paper on his Christmas wish list, because it will make him so happy. Some kids like toys? My kid likes office supplies.

This is the wish list George made for me. A country map, a purple blanket, and a sprinkle cookie.

George: Here’s a list you can have for your next birthday.
Mama: Oh, like a wish list? Wait, shouldn’t a country map be on your wish list?
George: No, you need one so you can know where all of the countries are.
Yes, he’s rubbing in the fact that he always knows where a country is located and I never seem to know. Then again, could you point to Palau on a map?!

We love a local Vietnamese restaurant, and it has one of those maneki-neko (or “lucky”) cats by the cash register.
 That kitty is waving at me!

What hilarious things have your kids or grandkids said recently?

Currently Reading:
Stepsister by Jennifer Donnelly – So, I broke a personal rule. Years ago, I realized I should never read book reviews while reading a book. Yes, I look at reviews to choose what books to read, but I shouldn’t read any while I’m reading. When I do, I inevitably find something negative or disheartening that skews my previously positive view of the book. Someone mentioned on GoodReads.com that this book would be better as a short story. Now, I find myself buying into that. It never would’ve occurred to me before! I’m reading this for a book club, however, so I will forge ahead!

Anyhow, Stepsister begins as Cinderella’s ugly stepsisters are maiming themselves to fit into the glass slipper with the hopes of becoming a princess (yes, Disney deleted that little scene in the actual fairy tale). So, what happens to the stepsisters after Cinderella waltzes off to the palace? My favorite part of this book is the behind-the-scenes characters. Chance and fate are personified. They are racing and scrambling to intercept one of the stepsisters before she makes critical, life-altering decisions. Clever idea.


Published by Christine Boatwright


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